2 Days in 1: My unfortunate day with transformation and Superman: the Return

I couldn't believe my luck! My transformation failed for the 2nd time (no colonies grew on the plate), and I just ran my third trial today hoping that it would work, or else I would have to postpone my whole week's of protein purification project. Currently, I am trying to blame the fault on something else besides myself, such as the agar plate itself; however, I was remembered that I was the one who prepared the plate. Urgh, got to find out the source of error real quick before my LB media gets bad. Fortunately, I had a nice "newbie" squash game with Tania at the gym today, which helped to mitigate my sense of frustration. I called it newbie because we did not know any of the rules and we just try to bounce the small semi-inelastic ball off the wall to one another. It was a good workout for me, but I guess it was just a warm up for Tania. That should put me to shame that I have such a low level of fitness compared to her. And shame on me! While I was trying to be fit over the summer, here I am munching away on Chips Ahoy (my third dinner for the night) dipped in milk. I guess the day that I look like Brandon Routh will just never arrive.

Talking about Routh, I just watched Superman: the Return on iMax theatre last night, and it was the preview (yeah, the movie officially starts tonight). And the cool thing was that parts of the movie was in 3D. Seeing Superman zooming in and out of the flat 2-dimensional screen was a thrilling experience, especially when you thought that the spaceshuttle (or whatever that was going to fall on you) was actually going to land on you. Also, 3D graphics can be really psychological: when the images of snow flakes fell on me, I shivered unintentionally, subconciously thinking that the icy cold water droplets would trickle down my neck when the snowflakes melt. Yeah, that was kind of silly, but it got me there.

Another cool feature the movie was that Brandon Routh (Clark Kent aka Superman) really resembles the deceased Christopher Reeve: they have the same body build, character, and even the same voice. And the beginning and the ending of the movie are very faithful to the earlier 2 Superman movies, which I think was cool albeit the credit fonts could use some technological touch in them.

One character that I dislike most in the movie (nope, not Lex Luthor, although he is a good antagonist, I must say) is Lois Lane. Her character was just absurd and I do not think that she understands Superman well enough to actually love him. And I think that she was apathetic towards the people around her. The most obvious reason was because we know that although Lois shared many intimate moments with Superman, she could not see the resemblance of Superman in Clark Kent. Was it because she chose to focus on the superstar and could not care less of the people around her? Superman did not bother to undisclose his identity (or else we would be watching a masked Superman), yet she wasn't aware of that. Did she love Superman because he is a world celebrity and paid less attention to the mediocre Clark Kent? Even her son and fiance, who have just met Superman, could see the resemblance between Superman and Clark Kent. Also, during the 5 year-period when Superman left, she became bitter and resentful towards Superman, which made her win the Putlizer Prize for her article entitled "Why the world does not need Superman". That wouldn't really make sense because she was the closest to Superman and should understand his motives and actions. Perhaps she was being emotional because she had his baby. Maybe she thought that Superman had left for good and would never return again; however, if only she had pooled her thoughts together, she could perhaps reason out why Superman was missing, or maybe have a little faith in her that one day he will return. Even Margeret, Superman's foster mother, knew that Clark would one day return, so why couldn't she? Maybe the director would think of adding a few touches on Lois's character in the next movie so that her love for Superman would be more convincing.

Research? Urgh...

So... It's already 6 pm and I am still stuck in the lab waiting for my polyacrylamide gel to stain before I can destain it. An average lab worker can afford to run 5 gels (and do many other peripheral tasks) in a day. However, it took me the entire day to run a single gel, after screwing up 3 gels in the morning. I think it was sort of my fault for not diluting the buffer 10 times before loading them onto the gel; however, I don't think that I should be blamed for the leaking apparatus that caused the gel to leak before it polymerized and therefore, earning a "you-screwed-up-again" glare from my post-doc. I think that my post-doc and I will be having a GREAT time over this summer :/

This summer has actually changed my entire scope of life, and I am rethinking of my career option (although there are not many choices to begin with). I mean, before working in the lab, I had this ambitious idea of getting my degrees and pursue my PhD at some prestigous graduate school. I had always thought that research is thrilling, because it means that one might make some shocking discovery that will shake the world. Yeah, dream on!

Working in this lab has made me realized what research is all about: trying to prove or answer your hypotheses. Discoveries are rare, and that only happens if one did something out of the norm and have a good sense of what's going on (+ luck too). Else, one will be spending his life trying to answer his questions by doing research (it's more like a curiosity quencher, where you find the answer on your own).

So, why do I think that doing research is not my thing? After spending weeks and weeks of pipetting solutions (mostly transparent or white, the most exciting ones are yellow) without having a general idea what those particles (the smal things that swim in the solution) do when you mix them together, it is just a laborious and boring task, especially when you spent an entire week trying to harvest 1 miligram (that's actually a lot) of protein which appears like air limau manis [but don't ever attempt to drink it!], or sometimes, the proteins did not turn out right and you have to redo the whole week's experiment again. Perhaps the most fun thing is analyzing the results on the gel. But as I have mentioned above, I suck at making gels... So, why research?

Therefore, I am actually reconsidering my naive idea of going to a graduate school to earn my PhD. I mean, getting a doctorate is very appealing, but at the same time, that would be like 4 - 6 years of pipetting and running gels. Do I really want to do that? However, I do not know what other career path that I can opt for with a major in Biochemistry. Perhaps being a CEO in a pharmaceutical company (another aspiring-yet-absurd facade) with my Econ degree might work, but that would require all sorts of miracle to happen. Urgh...

Sometimes I just do not wish to grow up. Life in high school or college seems more carefree. We can choose what we want to study for a short time of period, and switch to other fields if we do not like that current field, or continue to persue the course deeper if we were drawn towards the course. However, a career requires a long term commitment: it is very rare to see an accountant becoming a novelist in a year, or an aerospace engineer becoming a dentist (unless they have already pursued both careers at the same time). Thinking about what I will be doing 20 years down the road really scares me. I really do not wish to leave college...

Things were not going right...

I should have probably scribbled this down last night, but I was too tired from Green TD (introduced by Steven) that I went to bed immediately at midnight. Yeah, shame on me for not getting over with the Warcraft addiction yet.

So, after being yelled for 3 hours by my post-doc for the blunders that he made, I decided that it was a lovely weather to go out for a 1.5-mile run. It was all nice and such, until after I was done running it became scorching hot that I thought I would pass out before reaching my dorm. And yeah, I was such in a hurry to make it back to my room that I forgot to grab my dinner from nearby restaurant.

And because of that, I decided to nuke my own pizza. And things would have turned out well, if only I did not answer the phone and was late for 2 minutes to salvage my pizza from the oven. True to what I was afraid of, I have successfully burnt my pizza. Well, it didn't look that bad. I mean, the meat sauce and cheese looked good, except for the pepperoni which had turned reddish black (urgh! I don't like burnt pepperonies). That was until I decided to take a bite and tasted carbon (yiewww!!!), and it turned out that I had burnt the crust bottom crust. Despite the bitter taste of the carbon (the lovely meat sauce made up for that), the hungry me was still able to chow down 3/4 of the whole pizza (it's not that big...).

Anyway, the weather today looks good for running, but I hope the whole event yesterday will not repeat itself today. And while I'm jutting down all this down, I realize that I am 15 minutes late for work. Holy cow!!!

The Mysterious Suitemate

I have to admit that I have not been quite faithful to my blog since my last entry. The reason is - Warcraft. I have invested my whole weekend playing Defi4nc3 RPG and DOTA that I have a big migraine on Sunday morning. I can't blame that on anyone else but myself.

And finally I've met my suitemate, a Biology grad student (whom my friends dislike). Before I go any further, let me explain to you why I made this meeting an issue. When I first moved into my suite on June 2nd, he had already moved in (his kitchen utensils and food were all over the pantry and the bathroom was filled with toiletries), but I did not get to meet him that night. For 1.5 weeks, I had been trying to "bump" into him (well, I need to at least meet him since we are going to share the suite for the rest of the summer), but whenever I heard him in the kitchen and tried to meet him there, he was gone (door closed immediately *thump*). Several times when I had my door open, the door to his room was shut immediately after it was opened (our doors are facing each other). That was weird, and I concluded that my suitemate was trying to avoid meeting me.

Until this morning, while I was pouring myself a glass of milk in the kitchen, he walked in and we said "hi". Then he went into the bathroom and I went back to my room. It was a brief encounter, but oh well, at least I have met him, although I doubt that we are going to say anything more than "hi". Perhaps I am trying to be too cool, or perhaps I just don't feel like talking to him at all (unlike my last summer's suitemate, whom I think was one of the best suitemate ever). I guess that my current suitemate and I will be just 2 strangers living under the same roof. Nope, it's not going to change...

The Mysterious Suitemate

This is a bad news... I've moved into my new room for 2 days and I haven't met my roomate once. I knew that he has moved in because his utensils and food are all over the pantries while his toiletries are already arranged neatly in the bathroom. The funny thing was when I first moved into my new room, I thought that I got into the wrong room. Why? Let's say that the housing management told me that my suitemate is a guy; however, the stuffs in the kitchen and bathroom are something which I believe most girls will have (I might be a little bit sexist here, but seeing "Extra Virgin Olive Oil" on the food rack, fragrant candle in the bathroom and "Spinach Lover" in the refridgerator really threw me off, and I thought that I got into the wrong room since it was obviously a girl's suite). That was until I heard his voice in the kitchen with his friends: then I knew that he was a dude.

Yeap, but I still haven't bumped into him, let alone making a formal introduction. It's not that I am trying to be arrogant (or lan si), but the fact that he didn't come into my room to introduce himself the night I moved in (I knew he was in his room watching the TV) tells me that he would not appreciate any introductions. But Dan told me this morning that I should at least have a few words with him, since he's going to be my suitemate for the summer. I guess he is right. After all, it will really be awkward for me to share the same kitchen and bathroom with a guy that I have never talked to. I mean, somehow we got to coordinate between us about emptying the trash can or replacing the toilet papers. I guess that I should start thinking of an ice breaker to be said later today, instead of just saying "Hi, my name is Sher Mern and I am very pleased to meet you. I am glad that you are going to be my suitemate, and by the way, can I use your microwave oven?"

Saying goodbye is one of the hardest things to do

I was glad that I didn't cry that night when I left for the US. I've told myself not to, but I did shed a few drops of tears. I wished that I had a merrier departure; but I guess that you couldn't really be joyful about leaving behind those you love and care for. It sort of killed me when I walked through the check in gates and looked back to give a goodbye wave to my family.

As I walked through the gate, I kept asking myself why didn't I try to make my presence back home more worthwhile instead of playing dota every night? Why didn't I try to make them happier when I had the opportunity to? Why didn't I talk to them more? Don't get me wrong. I did spend my time with them, but I wish that I had spent much more. Sigh...

The reason why I was dying to study abroad was to be independent of my family. The further I was away from them, the better it was for me. To be truthful, before going back, I was not looking forward to this trip at all. I used to find it hard to fight for my freedom back home and to avoid my mom from over-controlling my life. However, when I was home this time, surprisingly I found myself free to do whatever or go wherever I wanted to, without my mom's pesterings (except that she still decided how I should take my shower). And I could communicate better with my dad, something which I found it awkward to do so a few years back. I guess that 2 years away from home had made me and my parents more tolerant and accomodative towards each other (my parents have a much larger contribution in this aspect than I do). Finally, I found myself yearning to be home with my family once again.

Thus, not surprisingly, when I arrived at my room last night, I called them right away (something that I didn't do at all for the last 2 years). Listenning to their voice over the phone made me felt at home. I think that I owe them an apology for neglecting them all the while I was in the US, but I want to apologize to them without telling them directly (it's pretty a pretty complicated thing. I think my friend Kenny might understand what I mean). I'm glad that this trip back home had triggered the guilty conscious in me and I am looking forward to going back next summer (hopefully).